When a friend of mine recently, in one of her updates on social media, decided to describe selfies as the ultimate form of Altruism, it made me laugh and laugh to no end.. And at that moment knew that I also wanted to express my opinion on this global phenomenon that is, The Selfie.
Everyone’s doing it and I mean EVERYONE !!! The teenage boys and girls, celebrities, your favorite bloggers (Ahem), the president of the United States and even the Pope !!! You can choose to love it or hate it, but you can definitely not ignore it ! Selfies are here to stay !!
Personally, I LOVE them !!! I mean, seriously, whats NOT to love about it !! A photograph of you (the one and only person who you get to be all your life) taken by you !!
Well, I love photographs and being photographed, in general (maybe this obsessive love comes from the fact that there are so few of mine from my childhood and infant-hood). I guess I’m just trying to make up for lost time, trying to chronicle my thoughts, moods and looks, in written words and in the form of photos.
Taking selfies and actually liking them requires absolute self-love. If you don’t love yourself on a very human level, you will definitely not like what you see on screen. It is almost a substitute to the mirror, which ONLY reflects what you are, in all your entirety !!
While trying to come up with a clever title for this blog post, I was wandering through the thesaurus website and I was horrified to find out that the thesaurus defines self-love as conceit, vanity and narcissism and its antonym being “modesty”. (Seriously !!!, You can see for yourself here)
Being someone who loves reading dictionaries, learning new words and using them in my everyday conversations and writing. I was both saddened and maddened by this ridiculous definition !!
We have all been raised to be “modest”, so going by this definition, we can only be modest if we stop loving ourselves. (That doesn’t sound right at all !) With all due respect to the contributors of the thesaurus, self-love isn’t conceit or vanity, its one of the most basic necessities for self-preservation.
I think the problem lies, mostly, in the fact that we were shamed and called selfish and self-absorbed if we (god forbid !!) dared to actually like ourselves !! No wonder we all grow up with so many insecurities ! Ah Insecurities…. The ugliest quality to have, its so destructive and self-consuming, its one of the qualities that makes us hate on someone of something that we barely know ! Its true. (everyone knows it !! And like all ugly truths of the world, its stays as our most protected secrets).
Well I have had ENOUGH !!!
Enough hate, enough jealousy, enough toxic energy.. Just Enough !
I’m going to tell you the Dirty Little Secret…. If you don’t even love yourself, you aren’t capable of loving others. If you feel shamed every time you act on this self-love, a la selfies, you are perpetuating your own insecurities… Its that simple !
Heavens know I have had more than my share of insecurities, I still struggle with a few… But there are more that I have overcome than the ones that still persist. I’m going to let you in on a little secret on how I overcame my insecurities and actually started liking myself. It need not involve an elaborate and extravagant change, just a slight shift in perspective…
Try this out (it worked for me, and how):
Step 1- Look at the mirror, Just LOOK at yourself, I am sure old habits will immediately start focusing on the flaws.
Look again and this time Smile !! 🙂 Smile like you’re meeting your loved ones after a really long time.
Now tell me, that you don’t think that person looking back at you isn’t beautiful !! Its not even possible !
Do this till you fall in love with yourself !! My recommended dosage is multiple times a day for desired results. 😉
Step 2- Pick up your smartphone/ camera and take that selfie !
Selfies need not be the ultimate form of altruism anymore ! It shouln’t be charity to love yourself. It should be common sense ! (Don’t you think so ?)
Step 3- Take as many selfies as you please !!! And don’t let anyone (including yourself) shame you about it !!
It amuses me to no end that this was supposed to be a short and light post.. 🙂 Oops..
Lets change this world one click at a time !!
Go on, now… Smile for the camera !!
until next time..
*click clickety click*