Life teaches you to be strong by putting you in circumstances where your only choice is to be strong.
Growing up, I never really tried to get to know myself (for the most part), I was happy to follow in the shadows of people around me, my sibling and cousins. What this did is, I had NO idea who I was, most of my after-school activities or hobbies were decided for me, never paying any attention to whether I liked it or not. And those were just hobbies. As they say how you do one thing is how you do all things, so I was clueless, and just flowed with life without much of a plan, until I came to a point where I had no choice but to figure myself out.
Guess what I realized, not only did I not know myself, I was also drowning in insecurities, which had built up over years and years of being compared to the people around me, and not paying attention to it soon enough. I fully understood this concept only recently when I watched this video Life whispers to you all the time through signals and signs and when we don’t pay attention to them, it gets louder and the signs become more obvious, and circumstances become more disastrous.
So when I finally paid attention to this, and realized how clueless I was, it woke me up with a jolt. I was in my late teens and I was trying to figure out who I was, and spend the next few years in a state of insecurity and self-loathing. It was horrible, but I’m grateful for it.
Again life sent all kinds of signs my way to catch my attention, and finally I realized what I was doing wrong. I was following the same redundant pattern of comparing myself with the people around me, and constantly coming up short and feeling not good enough. I cut off the patterns and consequently a LOT of toxic friendships, I got out of my toxic relationship, became unapologetic about self-care. And you know what, there were people who despised me for it, and that is how I knew they weren’t good for me.
After years and years of self love and treating my soul with TLC, I can finally say that my life feels good, rather than just look good, although it looks pretty good as well (me thinks).
Become your own superhero, save yourself (even if it is from yourself), build your self-esteem and make it so strong that it can whether the nastiness of the world (lets face it, it exists). Be your biggest ally and your own secret weapon.
I get asked sometimes how I got to become so confident, and I can’t help but smile because deep within me is the little clueless girl who was drowning in insecurities (when I finally met her) and has now come full circle, and I answer with – it took me years and years of falling in love with myself. That always gets a laugh, because the listener almost always thinks I’m kidding. I’m not.
Well, we all have our own stories of overcoming obstacles that can fill books. Every single one of us is going through something that feels difficult, we all have our own challenges. Realizing this has made me look at the world around me with a touch of compassion, and most importantly expect very little(or nothing) from the people around me. So when they do rise to the occasion, I am delighted, and when they don’t I am not disappointed.
Life is easier when you don’t carry a load on your shoulders. Give yourself permission to take the load off, replace it with a cape and embrace the superhero you are.
Although it must be said – Not all superheroes wear capes, some of us prefer cool socks. 😉
Peace & Love