This past week has been a pain in my back, sadly I mean that literally. My Monday started with shooting pain in my lower back, a pain so severe I couldn’t walk, or even move without crying, and on Tuesday it was diagnosed as a minor slip disc, and boy was I angry when I found out, it was unimaginable that me, a yoga doing 20 something girl could get it. It felt unfair and I was angry, although quiet on the outside, I was screaming internally. That was my state of being all the way till Wednesday. Finally around mid week, it dawned on me that One good thing that has come from this forced rest, is that I’ve had the time to stay still, meditate, do absolutely nothing, read and basically find a way to let all the pent up stress melt away.
One of the things that did happen this past week was finding part this amazing quote by Mr. Wilde, which is pretty much my life’s mantra, if you will, and it goes something like this –
To have no yesterday, and no tomorrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace.
Here and Now – the Only truth, all that we can be sure of. Not tomorrow, not 5 years from now, not life when we’re say 60! Not even the past, your past glories or past embarrassments, its all nothing but memories now. Stories.
Now – this moment. And the biggest, possibly the most difficult task is to be fully present, mind, body and spirit. To enjoy THIS moment.
It may seem very new age-y and pseudo intellectual. But really, its not. To be present, truly present in the moment, to share that part of your life with the person/s you are with. It is the best thing you could ever do! Believe me, there have been such moments which I wish never ended, but they did, because such is life, it keeps moving on, whether you want it to or not.
Maybe that is something that we should keep in mind, especially when life has managed to knock you down to our knees. This is also only a phase, a moment which will change. (for better or worse, I’m not sure, but it won’t be this way anymore). I take a lot of comfort from this because when you’re back hurts, everything hurts. Its possibly as bad as a heartbreak. But I know that this pain is only temporary. Tomorrow (or even the next hour), my body could heal to make me stronger. Therefore, despite the pain, I can be at peace, that this moment too will pass, the discomfort gives me clarity to take better care of myself. And that I definitely will. 🙂
Now back to the quote, when I saw part of it, it looked like a quote about here and now, but when I read the whole quote, its not about life at all, but about death. That death is a state of being at peace, a state of nothing-ness. It is sneaky how we thing something (or someone) is a certain way based on just one side of what is presented to us, and when we take a look at the bigger picture, it tells a different story.
This is the whole Quote –
As always, Mr. Wilde has given me something to think about. Perhaps, it is not to be too quick to judge something. I for one, am guilty of getting carried away, but this quote, in all its deceptive glory, really does give me something to change about myself, maybe not change, but evolve.. 🙂 That does have a better ring to it!
Today and the coming days will be more about improvement, healing, letting go of old hurt, and embracing all that is to come.
I used to think that to be positive was to suppress any negative feeling or disregard negative thoughts, and just fake being happy till I actually felt happy. But lately, I’ve begun to realize that any feeling or emotion must be acknowledged and felt to be fully and properly released from your system, otherwise it turns toxic. So if you’re sad- be sad, if you’re hurt- be hurt, if you’re in pain – feel it, and then let it go. Don’t let it bottle up in a dark corner and fester, only to blow up in your face when you least expect.
This, for me, has been one of the biggest lessons of 2016.
To allow myself to not be numb, to actually feel and be present in every aspect of life- physically, emotionally, spiritually. The biggest lesson ever learnt is to surrender. To be able to surrender to the moment, no questions asked, has been the most difficult and most rewarding experience. Life, after all is only now, that has been the biggest revelation.
All this, just in time for Solstice (winter solstice in the northern hemisphere and summer solstice in the southern hemisphere), its a perfect occasion to shift your energy from dark gloomy past and move to embrace bright new beginnings.
Solstice, it is believed, is a time the Universe gives us a bridge to let go of all that doesn’t serve us, and make space for a better brighter life.
If the earlier bit sounds too abstract, here is what you can practically do –
- Acknowledge the pain – Write things down, find a calm quiet place and write what you feel. Take stock of the year, both good and bad. Acknowlegde that it is okay not to have followed the plan. Life works out exactly as it should.
- Release the hurt – Now that you have written things down, release the pain. Don’t cling on to things and re live the hurt. Release it, by forgiving yourself, forgiving those you feel have hurt you, release that sense of entitlement. Imagine a calming energy envelop you as you let go. Forgive. You will feel ten pounds lighter!
- De-clutter – This can be done in many ways, the first thing to start with can be your physical space, your home, get rid of things you don’t need. Give things away.Clear your physical space. Then maybe do the same at your work place. And your online life – de-friend, unfollow and allow yourself to only be surrounded by things that really bring you joy. The rest is clutter, and they have got to go!
- Forgive – Forgive yourself. We tend to be our own harshest critics. Learn to also be your own biggest cheerleader. Its okay not to be perfect, but that is not an excuse to be unkind to yourself. Start by consciously forgiving yourself, and see how that will change your perspective.
- Embrace – After all the above, you will feel finally ready for all that is coming your way, embrace everything, the good and the bad. Find your bliss and cherish it.
Let this holiday season bring joy and light, because after the year we have all had, we deserve it.
Until next time, be good to yourself.
My thoughts exactly! 🙂
This morning, as I was perusing my Facebook timeline, I happened upon an article that a lovely friend shared. It was entitled “24 Things Women Should Stop Wearing After Age 30”, and it triggered Maximum Eye-Rolling from everyone who took the time out to read it.
Written by Kallie Provencher for RantChic.com, this “article” (I use the term loosely) highlighted things such as “leopard print”, “graphic tees”, and “short dresses” (because “By this age, women should know it’s always better to leave something to the imagination”). Kallie, it seems, has a number of opinions on what women over 30 should and shouldn’t be doing, having also penned “30 Things Women Over 30 Shouldn’t Own” and “20 Pictures Women Over 30 Need To Stop Posting Online”. (What is this magical post-30 land where women are suddenly not allowed to do or own so many things?!)
Motivated by Kallie’s “article”, I decided to…
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Some people can just string together words that otherwise seem so ordinary, but when strung together, it is a thing of beauty. I recently discovered Pablo Neruda, and with each of his word I read, I find myself falling.
So here is one that I read now, and HAD to share.
I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You – Poem by Pablo Neruda
I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.
Until next time, read more..
Something has been niggling on the back of my mind ever since my trip, and that is how sometimes people are awful for no reason, just like sometimes people are kind for no reason at all, both of these have a way of taking your breath away…
I’m a big believer of the Universe sending signals and moments of synchronicity when you feel like you’re perfectly in-sync with the cosmos. And finding this Quote makes me feel like this is the Universe’s way of soothing my frayed nerves. Hope you like it as much as I do.
One’s dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but cannot be taken away unless it is surrendered.
Michael J. Fox, Words of Wisdom (Volume 54)
Until next time..
In 20+ years of my existence, I have often been fascinated with Time. The concept of time is as man made as this computer, on which I am currently typing this post.
To me, one of the biggest insults is when I feel like my time has been wasted, because if there’s one thing I hate, its wastage (of anything). Wasting reflects disregard. You waste only those things that you hold in utter contempt, so when I feel like my time has been wasted, it is one of the (very) few things that actually me angry.
I digress, so many times I hear friends telling me they are “too busy” to meet, or coworkers use it to assert that they can’t handle any more work because they are “too busy”, I hear it from practically everyone, and it makes me wonder – since I consciously refrain from using this phrase unless I really AM busy (which is only at work) – am I the only one who is “not busy”? Am i doing enough with my time here, am I being too complacent about life, etc.
Time is an illusion, it has the ability to make believe that we have forever, like we are going to be around until the very end, and the only reality is NOW.
So all I have to say is this, try not to hide under the cloak of being “too busy”, try not to waste someone else’s time while you are “too busy” prioritizing everything else in your life, and later don’t begrudge that same someone when they have moved on. You see, time does that, it makes you move on along with it. We are hardly the same people we were yesterday, and so are our priorities.
Our time here is transient, thank god for that!
Unsure of how to conclude this post, I will leave you with my favorite Quote from the Buddha.
Until next time,
Have fun and be safe.
Just finished having lunch while reading a blog post about a 4 week diet that will help you lose weight, and a follow up post which is another diet plan for 4 more weeks to lose more weight, and I have to say, I wasn’t impressed. Don’t get me wrong, it was well written, and it did have meal options or snack options that I will definitely try to incorporate into my diet.
A little background, I have been working out for the last ten years now, having tried zumba, aerobics, going to the gym, insanity, and 7 years ago I settled into the practice of yoga and pilates, since these two give me the best results that I want, which is a sleek and fit body without being too muscular. I prefer this look since I am only 5’2″, and every ounce of extra weight tends to stick out like a sore thumb (exact words of advice that I got when I was 18 years old). As harsh as it may have felt at the time, it has motivated me to always be proactive in terms of my fitness routine. So a big thank you to the person who told me this.
After all these years, I can honestly say I love my time on the mat, I love how energized and fresh I feel after a workout. I feel sad and almost lethargic on days that I don’t workout. And if this was meant to be a post about the goodness of yoga or pilates or any other form of workouts that you enjoy doing, this post would’ve gone on and perhaps be made into a series. But that is not the point of this post. The point is as the title suggests.
The way I used to think about fitness until recently was that it was like a tripod, and the three things, all of which are equally important to be at your fittest best, are exercise, rest and nourishment.
That perhaps was my first mistake.
Fitness, however, is more of a balance between body, mind and spirit. (I know what you’re thinking, it seems hokey, and new age-y. It really is not)
The tripod that I mentioned earlier, which involves exercise, rest and nourishment focus on your body (your physical). Your mind and spirit, now those need a whole other kind of discipline and TCL in order to truly feel fit (a little about that later).
So some of the faux pas that I have noticed in my own fitness journey are:
#1. Fad diets
These are JUST awful. Lets be honest, they don’t work and they screw up your system in the long run. Your body needs quite a lot of nutrients to be healthy, so suddenly cutting out carbs or shocking your body with random “juice cleanse” or detox programs is not going to do you any good in the long run.
My ONLY diktat to myself when I have felt tempted to try a new diet, (which promises you the moon), is: I will only try it if I can consistently keep at it for the rest of my life. If not, Sorry, I’m sure it works as a temporary fix, but it is not for me. And the reason I stick to this rule of mine, is because I have tried these when I was in my teens and early 20s, and my body bounced back, simply because of age. As we grow older, the first thing that takes a hit is your metabolism, and please, for your own sake, don’t mess with it anymore.
#2. Low-fat or Zero-fat ingredients
If you see that something is low-fat or zero-fat, especially things that are supposed to fat in them, I’ve got two words for you to always remember: Chemical Shit-storm.
There was a time when ALL the food that humans consumed was “Organic”, sadly we don’t live in those days.
So if you see the label and it says, non fat, or gimmicky names like which suggest that it tastes exactly like an ingredient, but doesn’t have any of the ingredient in question in its contents, you can be sure that it is probably not good for you.
So stay away from such chemically enhanced products if you can help it.
#3. Fad workouts
The reason I avoid fad workouts is the same reason as above, my fitness goal is not to lose weight, but to be healthy and fit! As should be anyone else’s who wants to change their bodies for the better. Don’t go hurting yourself because you pushed yourself to do a workout which weakens you in the long run.
#4. Obsessing over results of friends (or worse, heavily photo-shopped celebrities)
This is a BIG one, and unfortunately I have been guilty of this. But here is the thing, every one of us has a different body, every single person has different issues, different problem areas, different environments, different resources (time, trainer, food etc.) so it is actually the most unfair expectation to keep from your body that you expect it to behave the same way as the billions of other people in the world that you see around you or see pictures of on social media.
Embrace the fact that you are unique, and different from the rest of the world, and love what you’ve got, and make your fitness goal about enhancing your body to be its fittest best.
#5. ONLY focusing on the body/ the physical fitness
This is something that I said earlier, and at the risk of sounding hokey, I’m going to say it again, fitness is not ONLY about the body. Sure, your body being fit is what the rest of the world sees to determine whether you are fit or not.
And the day I write posts which advocate seeking approvals or validation from the outside, it’ll probably be the day after never.. 🙂
(I digress) Yes, physical fitness is Very important, but equally important is your mental and spiritual health. Focus on having a happy and joyous disposition, and feeling balanced, take a walk, clear out the clutter, unfriend those toxic people, say no to things that do nothing other than cause you stress, meditate (if that’s your thing), go for a swim (the noiseless calm when you’re under water, can be the most relaxing feeling ever). Develop a good attitude and build your own self-esteem, and believe me, you will start to feel so good (no matter what dress size you wear), and if that isn’t enough, the people around you will take notice as well (don’t think its possible? well, try it for yourself).
The Energy you will exude when you love yourself is something fantastic! ❤
#6. Internet things
I know its the 21st century, I know that the internet is accessible by anyone and everyone at all time, and yes it makes life easier, and what not.
But perhaps it is exactly this that crowds us with a LOT of unwanted noise. (the irony is definitely not lost on me, considering you will find this post on the internet). And I am not talking about opinions and advice that get around, I am talking about the miracle pills, or corsets that shrink your waistline, or the tea which will melt away the fat, as if by magic. Trust me, the ONLY thing losing weight because of these miracles potions and pills is your wallet!
So try to think about what you choose to spend your hard earned money on, and more importantly what you’re willing to put into your body (if you mess this up, you can’t buy another one, so treat it accordingly, with the care it deserves).
Well, those are the 6 biggies in my book. And if you can, please avoid them.
And hopefully this post will inspire you to start something today which you can keep up for the rest of your lives (baby steps, people).
Until my next post.
Stay healthy, and be awesome!